Remember Me This Way
After having a lot of time to sit back and think about this topic, I have made a few changes in the way I want to be remembered.
This past weekend I attended a funeral service for a women I never really knew, my great aunt, Gretchen Tremmel. Although I never really knew her, I felt as though I had forever. This service wasn't really a funeral, she told her family that when she died, that she didn't want a huge funeral with lots of people standing around her body in a casket, staring down at her crying. She wanted her family and friends to celebrate, to get together and enjoy that time with the other family members that don't get to see one another often. What it turned out to be was a party. It was held in a church's community room; there was food, friends and family, there to share the times. As everyone went around the room and said whom they were, how they knew or were related to her, they were also given a chance to share a fond memory of theirs, good or bad. I have to say this is what touched me most deeply. Seeing her family and friends talk about what a great person she was to them, how much she cared and how much she devoted herself to helping other, filled my eyes with tears. Although this wasn't supposed to be a sad occasion, it was hard to fight back these emotions. At that moment, I knew.
When I die I don't want people to stand around my casket, staring down on me. I want people to celebrate, my new life, and cherish the rest of theirs with the people who they care about. I want to be remembered, remembered not for what I did, my success, but for the lives I touched, either good or bad. I want me family and friends to share with one another, the kind of person I was, and how I touched each of their lives. I believe that when you die that you can look down on the world, to watch over the people you love. With my already deceased family by my side, we will be looking down upon them celebrating right along with them. Sometime during this service I want some things shared, poems, letters I have written to a person, songs that the lyrics help explain something to someone that I couldn't say before. Things that I want to say to the people I love.
(Song) Will You Remember Me This Way… Sarah McLachlan
(Song) Remember Me This Way... Jordan Hill
(Song) If Tomorrow Never Comes... Garth Brooks
Thursday, February 19, 1998
Friday, February 13, 1998
The Ideal Body
The Ideal Body
The strive for "the ideal body" is something that stares many people in the face. Although there are many things out there to keep people in good physical health, such as, Gym's, nutritious foods, juices, vitamins etc. whereas the average working person doesn't have either the time or money for these things, as in myself.
Particularly, at this point in my life, my priorities are settled on getting or maintaining the perfect body. Although it is important to me, my habits, because they will eventually show in the future. Lately, I am finding myself eating the "wrong foods" and not making time to exercise. Although I am a teenager, I work off a lot of what I eat, it still shows due to the fact that I don't have extra time to go to the gym. Also financially I don't have the money for all of these high priced so-called healthy regimens.
Diets, to me, are just a easy way to loose weight, sometimes not so simple. It takes more than just a layout of what you need to do and eat. It takes will power and determinations to get the results that you want and in the long run, need to live a balanced life.
The strive for "the ideal body" is something that stares many people in the face. Although there are many things out there to keep people in good physical health, such as, Gym's, nutritious foods, juices, vitamins etc. whereas the average working person doesn't have either the time or money for these things, as in myself.
Particularly, at this point in my life, my priorities are settled on getting or maintaining the perfect body. Although it is important to me, my habits, because they will eventually show in the future. Lately, I am finding myself eating the "wrong foods" and not making time to exercise. Although I am a teenager, I work off a lot of what I eat, it still shows due to the fact that I don't have extra time to go to the gym. Also financially I don't have the money for all of these high priced so-called healthy regimens.
Diets, to me, are just a easy way to loose weight, sometimes not so simple. It takes more than just a layout of what you need to do and eat. It takes will power and determinations to get the results that you want and in the long run, need to live a balanced life.
Tuesday, February 10, 1998
Crime, the Death Penalty and Justice
The death penalty is an easy method of justice. I do agree with this decision, if made, only if for good reason. I believe an eye for an eye, although I only think that way due to prison being too easy on it's inmates. There's no punishment and justice in a person being sent to prison, even if it's for life, if all they are going to do is sit around, watch television, play pool and socialize.
Socialization is a skill you have to have or you will not survive, but not socializing over a hand of cards but a book and paper. I believe that prisoners do need an education. After leaving, offenders should have some skills to live by. For instance, my brother was sent to prison five years ago to serve a sentence of two to 30 years. Now he is finally been tried for another crime and is on his way to Federal Prison. He cannot leave until his time is up, until he has passed a GED, taken a vocational class to learn a specific trade, has set up a job that involves that trade, not just a minimum wage job and a place to live.
Personally I think prison should be a place for punishment along with rehabilitation. Many prisoners are either not offered schooling in prison or do not choose to advance themselves with what may be offered, which is only hurting themselves in the long run. To make these offenders advance themselves the courts should take the step to make them take classes and have things set up for them. Prison should be a strict, instead of laid back place to repent your wrongdoings'.
Socialization is a skill you have to have or you will not survive, but not socializing over a hand of cards but a book and paper. I believe that prisoners do need an education. After leaving, offenders should have some skills to live by. For instance, my brother was sent to prison five years ago to serve a sentence of two to 30 years. Now he is finally been tried for another crime and is on his way to Federal Prison. He cannot leave until his time is up, until he has passed a GED, taken a vocational class to learn a specific trade, has set up a job that involves that trade, not just a minimum wage job and a place to live.
Personally I think prison should be a place for punishment along with rehabilitation. Many prisoners are either not offered schooling in prison or do not choose to advance themselves with what may be offered, which is only hurting themselves in the long run. To make these offenders advance themselves the courts should take the step to make them take classes and have things set up for them. Prison should be a strict, instead of laid back place to repent your wrongdoings'.
Wednesday, January 28, 1998
Weapons in School
Weapons in School
A weapon is usually considered a weapon if it is something used to harm another person. Guns, knives, razors and bombs etc. are considered weapons. All of these could seriously hurt or even kill someone. In my opinion if a student has taken a weapon to school to intentionally hurt someone they should be permanently expelled from the school district. These students should not be expelled just so that they can attend school in another district, but so that they can be placed into some sort of violence rehabilitation, to learn how to control their anger and to find alternate ways to deal with bad social situations instead of resolving to violence.
A few ways to prevent students from bringing weapons to school is to teach some sort of violence class in the school, to show students the impact weapons have on society, along with the consequences. Another method is to show that there is strong concern for this problem by installing metal detectors at the front doors or having an on campus security officer. If situations keep getting worse, have bag and body searches on a daily basis. Sooner or later the students will realize that this is a serious matter and that it is not worth all this just to bring a weapon to school, weapon, protection or otherwise.
A weapon is usually considered a weapon if it is something used to harm another person. Guns, knives, razors and bombs etc. are considered weapons. All of these could seriously hurt or even kill someone. In my opinion if a student has taken a weapon to school to intentionally hurt someone they should be permanently expelled from the school district. These students should not be expelled just so that they can attend school in another district, but so that they can be placed into some sort of violence rehabilitation, to learn how to control their anger and to find alternate ways to deal with bad social situations instead of resolving to violence.
A few ways to prevent students from bringing weapons to school is to teach some sort of violence class in the school, to show students the impact weapons have on society, along with the consequences. Another method is to show that there is strong concern for this problem by installing metal detectors at the front doors or having an on campus security officer. If situations keep getting worse, have bag and body searches on a daily basis. Sooner or later the students will realize that this is a serious matter and that it is not worth all this just to bring a weapon to school, weapon, protection or otherwise.
Monday, November 17, 1997
Child Discipline
Ways to discipline your children may be the most controversial topic among raising children. Some agree that spanking your child may be considered child abuse, on the other hand, the majority of those who were raised on spankings when they did wrong, beg to differ. I myself am a child of the age when spankings were allowed, within limits of the law. Myself, I feel that if I didn't receive a hit when I didn't pick up my room, I would be one of the messiest people known.
There are many ways to discipline your child, and each child is different and act differently towards different kinds of discipline. I know for myself "time out" probably wouldn't have worked for me. Although spanking should be a last resort, if all else fails. This kind of discipline should only be used in the home, by the parents. Teachers, baby sitters. should find an alternate way to discipline your child.
In conclusion it is the parents choice to see which role of discipline works with their child, if spankings are what works, it should not be illegal, unless it moves onto physical abuse and or emotional or physical scaring.
There are many ways to discipline your child, and each child is different and act differently towards different kinds of discipline. I know for myself "time out" probably wouldn't have worked for me. Although spanking should be a last resort, if all else fails. This kind of discipline should only be used in the home, by the parents. Teachers, baby sitters. should find an alternate way to discipline your child.
In conclusion it is the parents choice to see which role of discipline works with their child, if spankings are what works, it should not be illegal, unless it moves onto physical abuse and or emotional or physical scaring.
Friday, May 23, 1997
What’s The Reason?
What’s The Reason?
What’s the reason
For waking up in the morning?
What’s the reason,
For keeping a head upon my shoulders?
What’s the reason,
For controlling my frustrations?What’s the reason,
For trying to grasp my sanity?What’s the reason,
For working as hard as I can?What’s the reason,
For loving every minute of every day?What’s the reason,
For smiling, laughing, crying?
What’s the reason?
The Reason is you
You, make me want to face the day
You, help me keep a head upon my shoulders
You, have this power to help control my frustrations and
Grasp my sanity
You, make me want to work as hard as I can
To…
Smile at you,
Laugh with you,
And cry with me
What’s the reason
For waking up in the morning?
What’s the reason,
For keeping a head upon my shoulders?
What’s the reason,
For controlling my frustrations?What’s the reason,
For trying to grasp my sanity?What’s the reason,
For working as hard as I can?What’s the reason,
For loving every minute of every day?What’s the reason,
For smiling, laughing, crying?
What’s the reason?
The Reason is you
You, make me want to face the day
You, help me keep a head upon my shoulders
You, have this power to help control my frustrations and
Grasp my sanity
You, make me want to work as hard as I can
To…
Smile at you,
Laugh with you,
And cry with me
Today...
Today...
Today I turned over a new rock in my life. I have always dreamed of being someone else, someone different, today I was. I can't pinpoint who or what I was, what I was acting like or what exactly brought about this change. I've never cared for any other person like I feel today and forever. Their thoughts, their feelings, their steps through life mean everything to me. I have feelings like I've never felt before. I always thought that love was the world’s strongest emotion. But today I revealed to myself that I was wrong. The way I feel goes much deeper than that. Through all the tribulations, we have stuck together. All the fights, heartbreaks, and raging emotions. The way I feel about this person is virtually indescribable. I would do anything foe them, die if I had to, if it meant that they would live. My emotions for this person are unmatchable, incurable and unstoppable.
Today I turned over a new rock in my life. I have always dreamed of being someone else, someone different, today I was. I can't pinpoint who or what I was, what I was acting like or what exactly brought about this change. I've never cared for any other person like I feel today and forever. Their thoughts, their feelings, their steps through life mean everything to me. I have feelings like I've never felt before. I always thought that love was the world’s strongest emotion. But today I revealed to myself that I was wrong. The way I feel goes much deeper than that. Through all the tribulations, we have stuck together. All the fights, heartbreaks, and raging emotions. The way I feel about this person is virtually indescribable. I would do anything foe them, die if I had to, if it meant that they would live. My emotions for this person are unmatchable, incurable and unstoppable.
Slipping Away
Slipping Away
I always felt as though I had the power, the power that drew people towards me. I’m not sure if it was my personality or what it was, but everyone used to like me, care about me. Lately I feel deserted, alone, scared. I feel that there is no one around me that cares about me, what I do, or what I want to become. With every ounce that there is, I spend it on someone else; I live to please. I feel so frustrated, as though everyone I’ve ever cared for is slipping through my fingers. I try to grasp them but their falling further and further from my reach. Who’s to blame? Is it my fault? Am I pushing them away or are they leaving under their own free will? I use every bit of sanity I have just to make it through each day. Arguments occur spontaneously. One minute we’ll be carrying on a detailed conversation and the next we’ll be at each other’s throats threatening to leave. Leaving is the last thing I want to happen, leaving is giving up, giving in. the way I see it, I never want it to end, but on the other hand, I give up.
I always felt as though I had the power, the power that drew people towards me. I’m not sure if it was my personality or what it was, but everyone used to like me, care about me. Lately I feel deserted, alone, scared. I feel that there is no one around me that cares about me, what I do, or what I want to become. With every ounce that there is, I spend it on someone else; I live to please. I feel so frustrated, as though everyone I’ve ever cared for is slipping through my fingers. I try to grasp them but their falling further and further from my reach. Who’s to blame? Is it my fault? Am I pushing them away or are they leaving under their own free will? I use every bit of sanity I have just to make it through each day. Arguments occur spontaneously. One minute we’ll be carrying on a detailed conversation and the next we’ll be at each other’s throats threatening to leave. Leaving is the last thing I want to happen, leaving is giving up, giving in. the way I see it, I never want it to end, but on the other hand, I give up.
Wednesday, May 7, 1997
My Feelings for You
My Feelings for You
My feelings for you grow stronger
As each day goes by.
If I professed my love for you
Things would never be the same.
I see that twinkle in your eye
It fills my life with joy.
Your laugh so cute
It sends a smile across my face.
Those words that you whisper
Sends a tingle up my spine.
I hope to hear those three special words
I Love You.
My feelings for you grow stronger
As each day goes by.
If I professed my love for you
Things would never be the same.
I see that twinkle in your eye
It fills my life with joy.
Your laugh so cute
It sends a smile across my face.
Those words that you whisper
Sends a tingle up my spine.
I hope to hear those three special words
I Love You.
Tuesday, April 29, 1997
Sometimes I Find
Sometimes I Find
Sometimes I find myself alone
Thinking of all the times I've had
Some the best, some the worst
Although everything seems to
Work its way out
I am always scared,
Scared
If what the future has for me
Alone with only
my thoughts to keep me safe.
Sometimes I find myself alone
Thinking of all the times I've had
Some the best, some the worst
Although everything seems to
Work its way out
I am always scared,
Scared
If what the future has for me
Alone with only
my thoughts to keep me safe.
My Friends
My Friends
My friends are my everything
They are my light of day
The darkness of the night
The tear in my eye
And the smile across my face
My friends are my everything
They are my light of day
The darkness of the night
The tear in my eye
And the smile across my face
Sunday, April 27, 1997
Tonight Is Your Night
Tonight Is Your Night
Tonight everything will be perfect. The room lit with several candles, soft music is flowing through the air. The atmosphere is warm and gentle. This night will be dedicated to you and you only.
There are only two people in the room, you and one other person. You will talk endlessly about your deepest, darkest, thoughts, ideas, feelings and emotions. The questions you will be asked do not have to be answered, it is all up to what you want to be shared. Tonight is a night for absolute bonding; you will get to know the other person like you've never known another before. Any questions that you ask will be answered regardless of privacy.
The reasoning behind this night is for you to let loose. To get close to another person, start a relationship like no other. Tonight you may feel emotions ranging from happiness to sorrow, you will laugh and you may cry. Don't be embarrassed, don't be shy, don't be afraid to be yourself, just let go. Nobody's going to laugh at you, maybe with you. Tonight is a night for comfort, anything that you've held in private or secrecy that you said you'd never share with another soul may be let out, if you’re comfortable.
This night is a night for trust and friendship building. If you need someone you can confide in and someone who will listen to you and perhaps advise you... Tonight Is Your Night.
Tonight everything will be perfect. The room lit with several candles, soft music is flowing through the air. The atmosphere is warm and gentle. This night will be dedicated to you and you only.
There are only two people in the room, you and one other person. You will talk endlessly about your deepest, darkest, thoughts, ideas, feelings and emotions. The questions you will be asked do not have to be answered, it is all up to what you want to be shared. Tonight is a night for absolute bonding; you will get to know the other person like you've never known another before. Any questions that you ask will be answered regardless of privacy.
The reasoning behind this night is for you to let loose. To get close to another person, start a relationship like no other. Tonight you may feel emotions ranging from happiness to sorrow, you will laugh and you may cry. Don't be embarrassed, don't be shy, don't be afraid to be yourself, just let go. Nobody's going to laugh at you, maybe with you. Tonight is a night for comfort, anything that you've held in private or secrecy that you said you'd never share with another soul may be let out, if you’re comfortable.
This night is a night for trust and friendship building. If you need someone you can confide in and someone who will listen to you and perhaps advise you... Tonight Is Your Night.
Monday, April 7, 1997
What I Learned in Life
What I Learned in Life
Everything in life has a meaning. Cherish all. Memories last forever. Get over it. If it’s bound to happen, it will. Good things come to you when you least expect it. Work hard and you will get what you want. Live life to the fullest. Don’t settle for less than the best. Be spontaneous. Be the person you want to be, not who everyone else thinks you should be, be yourself. When a good thing comes, let it flow, don’t push it away. Let things come to you, don’t run to them, don’t chase. People do things because they care, or they wouldn’t have done them. I come first, do what I want to do. Don’t try too hard. If it doesn’t work, fix it.
What I’ve learned from John Alton
Listen, talk, talk things out instead of arguing. Try everything once, if you don’t like it you don’t have to do it again. Stop, don’t push. Satisfy yourself first. Don’t be spoiled. Speak what you feel. Don’t trust until it’ earned. Don’t try too hard, if someone doesn’t want to do something, they’re not going to. Work hard, spend as you wish, you earned it. Don’t take everything to heart.
What I’ve learned from James Poma
Don’t start out a relationship with intimacy. Don’t jump into things too quick. Don’t smother people. Keep a distance if you want a good relationship. Don’t say things you don’t mean. Show how you love people in multiple ways. Don’t turn everything into a big deal. Cherish every moment. Talk things out. Don’t trust before you’re ready. Find a common ground. Do things you both enjoy. Don’t push people away, persistence. If it’s not right in your mind, don’t do it.
Please yourself first. Think before you speak. Get to know people inside and out.
Everything in life has a meaning. Cherish all. Memories last forever. Get over it. If it’s bound to happen, it will. Good things come to you when you least expect it. Work hard and you will get what you want. Live life to the fullest. Don’t settle for less than the best. Be spontaneous. Be the person you want to be, not who everyone else thinks you should be, be yourself. When a good thing comes, let it flow, don’t push it away. Let things come to you, don’t run to them, don’t chase. People do things because they care, or they wouldn’t have done them. I come first, do what I want to do. Don’t try too hard. If it doesn’t work, fix it.
What I’ve learned from John Alton
Listen, talk, talk things out instead of arguing. Try everything once, if you don’t like it you don’t have to do it again. Stop, don’t push. Satisfy yourself first. Don’t be spoiled. Speak what you feel. Don’t trust until it’ earned. Don’t try too hard, if someone doesn’t want to do something, they’re not going to. Work hard, spend as you wish, you earned it. Don’t take everything to heart.
What I’ve learned from James Poma
Don’t start out a relationship with intimacy. Don’t jump into things too quick. Don’t smother people. Keep a distance if you want a good relationship. Don’t say things you don’t mean. Show how you love people in multiple ways. Don’t turn everything into a big deal. Cherish every moment. Talk things out. Don’t trust before you’re ready. Find a common ground. Do things you both enjoy. Don’t push people away, persistence. If it’s not right in your mind, don’t do it.
Please yourself first. Think before you speak. Get to know people inside and out.
Monday, March 10, 1997
Dialogue
"Twinkle, twinkle, little star, how I wonder what you are? I wish I may, I wish I might have the wish I wish tonight."
"Isn't it a beautiful night?" asked Suzie. "Yeah, those stars are pretty cool, aren't they? By the way, what did ya wish for?" replied James. "If I told you, it wouldn't come true." Oh c 'mon, you can tell me." "Sorry, can't do, maybe after it happens I might." "Fine," replied James.
The night was warm; the stars are shining bright, mosquitoes biting, the fire roaring. The two of them lied across they're sleeping bags and stared aimlessly into the clear dark sky, without a care in the world. The two of them talked into the night, about anything and everything that drifted through their imaginative, wondering minds, family, friends, school, relationships, and their outlook into the future that was staring them in the face. All of a sudden everything seemed to get very quiet all that could be heard was the fire crackling, and the plenty sounds of nature. The strain of silence made Suzie anticipated, anticipated about the next possible questions that will leave James mouth. But nothing, not a word was spoken for a few more moments. Suzie carefully glanced over towards James to make sure that he was still awake. His eyes were wide open, his hand behind his head, and the look of confusion streaming across his face. She turned her head back towards the sky and thought to herself for a moment.
"James?" "Yeah," sighed James. "What are you thinking about?" The silence once again lit the air. This time only for a few, long seconds. "Well, I was kinda wondering." Yeah," replied Suzie. "I was curious if you'd mind." "Yeah go ahead," Suzie replied during the break in his sentence. "If you would mind if I kissed you?"
"Isn't it a beautiful night?" asked Suzie. "Yeah, those stars are pretty cool, aren't they? By the way, what did ya wish for?" replied James. "If I told you, it wouldn't come true." Oh c 'mon, you can tell me." "Sorry, can't do, maybe after it happens I might." "Fine," replied James.
The night was warm; the stars are shining bright, mosquitoes biting, the fire roaring. The two of them lied across they're sleeping bags and stared aimlessly into the clear dark sky, without a care in the world. The two of them talked into the night, about anything and everything that drifted through their imaginative, wondering minds, family, friends, school, relationships, and their outlook into the future that was staring them in the face. All of a sudden everything seemed to get very quiet all that could be heard was the fire crackling, and the plenty sounds of nature. The strain of silence made Suzie anticipated, anticipated about the next possible questions that will leave James mouth. But nothing, not a word was spoken for a few more moments. Suzie carefully glanced over towards James to make sure that he was still awake. His eyes were wide open, his hand behind his head, and the look of confusion streaming across his face. She turned her head back towards the sky and thought to herself for a moment.
"James?" "Yeah," sighed James. "What are you thinking about?" The silence once again lit the air. This time only for a few, long seconds. "Well, I was kinda wondering." Yeah," replied Suzie. "I was curious if you'd mind." "Yeah go ahead," Suzie replied during the break in his sentence. "If you would mind if I kissed you?"
Saturday, March 1, 1997
You're...
You're...
My friend
My companion
Through good times
and bad
My friend
My buddy
Through happy
and sad
Beside me you stand
Beside me you walk
You're there to listen
You're there to talk
With happiness
With smiles
With pain
and tears
I know you'll be there
throughout the years!
My friend
My companion
Through good times
and bad
My friend
My buddy
Through happy
and sad
Beside me you stand
Beside me you walk
You're there to listen
You're there to talk
With happiness
With smiles
With pain
and tears
I know you'll be there
throughout the years!
Wednesday, February 26, 1997
The Long Drive Home
The Long Drive Home
The day was Sunday, March 17, 1996. It was St. Patrick’s Day, my aunt’s birthday, and a day I will never forget.
Elle, my friend and I had just gotten out of work and were making plans with our friends to go out together and do something. We all met up at a friends house, when we decided that we needed to pick up Kevin too, seems how Elle was just 'in love' with him, and couldn't go a day without seeing him. He lived clear out in the middle of no where, a quiet little area outside of town.
There were two cars full, actually, two in my car and four in my other friends car. The whole way there we were playing car tag, slowing down, then speeding up, passing each other and such, just for the hell of it. We finally made it to the back dirt roads, 'now we can really have some fun,' I thought to myself.
We were racing down the road, when she cut me off. That really pissed me off, so I raced up along side of her, and sharply cut her off, little did I know at the time we were going around a bend in the road. After I passed her I hit the soft shoulder, which, needless to say, threw my car out of control. It threw us across to the other side of the road. At that time I managed to slam into a mailbox. The impact of hitting the mailbox threw the car up into the air, flying over the neighbor’s driveway and the majority of their yard, landing in the middle of it. At that point we did two turnarounds and went strait for some trees. I knew for sure that was the last gasp of breath I would ever take, when all of a sudden the car made another turnaround, in the middle of the trees of all places. I had the tightest grasp on the steering wheel; Elle took my seat belt off, ripped my hands off the wheel, and turned the ignition off. She tried to open her door, it wouldn't, she leaned over to push mine open, and neither would budge. At that point I leaned across her, pushed the button in the glove box, and we made our way out the hatch of the wagon.
I went strait for the front of the car; I sat down in front of it, and just starred at it for about 30 seconds. I got up and started to walk around it, all I could seem to say was, 'my mom's gonna kill me, my mom's gonna kill me.' The man and woman that lived in this house came outside. She took a look and her mouth just dropped open. I glanced around, the mailbox was just about on their porch, their yard was dug up to hell, and my car was in the middle of a bunch of trees. I got down on my knees and started to cry.
The woman walked over to me, and tried to comfort me, but again all I could say was 'my mom's gonna' kill me...’ Within fifteen minutes a policeman had arrived. My body shook tremendously as I had to explain the details of the accident. Although my friend wanted me to tell the man that she was at no fault I just explained exactly what happened and let him decide if she was or not.
The policeman was very nice. My friend ended up with a careless driving ticket and me with a reckless driving ticket.
It wasn't just a ticket, it was a ticket, a messed up car, a neighbors yard to fix up, a messed up mind, and a soon to be very pissed off mother.
It was kind of weird; I just jumped right back into the car and drove right out of their yard. I felt horrible; I didn't know what to expect when I returned home. It was almost dawn so I decided to make a quick stop by the car wash, hoping that my mom wouldn't notice. Besides the damage to the car didn't look all that bad, some messed up body damage, where I had hit the mailbox, and a bunch of branches sticking out from the car.
I dropped my friend off and cruised home. I had gotten out of trouble for the night but I will hear it in the morning. The next morning I had woken up and was getting ready for school. My mother went outside to start the car to take me to school. I really didn't want to go out there. She didn't say anything the whole way to school. So I was hoping she didn't notice. I returned home from school to find the car gone and a note stuck to the refrigerator. I sat down and read it. The note said that in order to fix that neighbors’ yard the car insurance would increase three times as much as it was. Although I would have to pay it. I knew with the job I had and going to school, the only other choice I had was to surrender my license back to the state. I also had to pay for the damage to the car, which unknown to me was more than I thought. The car ended up with small body damage that equaled 250 dollars alone, a broken headlight, four new tires, and a front-end alignment needed. All of this equaled a little more than 400 dollars, which had to come out of my pocket. Everything that happens in life teaches you a lesson' is one of my philosophies. Trying to figure out what it's trying to teach you is the hard part. Except in this situation. What I learned from this life experience was that life is worth a little more than I had thought. When Elle and I were flying through the air, we remembered later, that we grabbed each other's arms and yelled 'we're gonna die' to each other. Right then death was looking us in the face and it could have been prevented. All the consequences that come with an accident aren't worth fooling around with cars. Just think about it, if I was to live and my best friend in the car with me didn't. How guilty would I feel for the rest of my life, how could I wake up everyday knowing that I had taken someone’s life away from them? So when my friends decide that they want to go play car tag, I simply let them know that cars are not toys, and if their going to do it knowing what I had to go through, then let me out. Being in an accident, being that close to death gives you a better outlook and awareness of the world. You don't take life for granted anymore and are more cautious of dangerous situations. I'm just trying to make others aware of the danger and consequences of reckless driving. Try to be careful and live life to the fullest.
The day was Sunday, March 17, 1996. It was St. Patrick’s Day, my aunt’s birthday, and a day I will never forget.
Elle, my friend and I had just gotten out of work and were making plans with our friends to go out together and do something. We all met up at a friends house, when we decided that we needed to pick up Kevin too, seems how Elle was just 'in love' with him, and couldn't go a day without seeing him. He lived clear out in the middle of no where, a quiet little area outside of town.
There were two cars full, actually, two in my car and four in my other friends car. The whole way there we were playing car tag, slowing down, then speeding up, passing each other and such, just for the hell of it. We finally made it to the back dirt roads, 'now we can really have some fun,' I thought to myself.
We were racing down the road, when she cut me off. That really pissed me off, so I raced up along side of her, and sharply cut her off, little did I know at the time we were going around a bend in the road. After I passed her I hit the soft shoulder, which, needless to say, threw my car out of control. It threw us across to the other side of the road. At that time I managed to slam into a mailbox. The impact of hitting the mailbox threw the car up into the air, flying over the neighbor’s driveway and the majority of their yard, landing in the middle of it. At that point we did two turnarounds and went strait for some trees. I knew for sure that was the last gasp of breath I would ever take, when all of a sudden the car made another turnaround, in the middle of the trees of all places. I had the tightest grasp on the steering wheel; Elle took my seat belt off, ripped my hands off the wheel, and turned the ignition off. She tried to open her door, it wouldn't, she leaned over to push mine open, and neither would budge. At that point I leaned across her, pushed the button in the glove box, and we made our way out the hatch of the wagon.
I went strait for the front of the car; I sat down in front of it, and just starred at it for about 30 seconds. I got up and started to walk around it, all I could seem to say was, 'my mom's gonna kill me, my mom's gonna kill me.' The man and woman that lived in this house came outside. She took a look and her mouth just dropped open. I glanced around, the mailbox was just about on their porch, their yard was dug up to hell, and my car was in the middle of a bunch of trees. I got down on my knees and started to cry.
The woman walked over to me, and tried to comfort me, but again all I could say was 'my mom's gonna' kill me...’ Within fifteen minutes a policeman had arrived. My body shook tremendously as I had to explain the details of the accident. Although my friend wanted me to tell the man that she was at no fault I just explained exactly what happened and let him decide if she was or not.
The policeman was very nice. My friend ended up with a careless driving ticket and me with a reckless driving ticket.
It wasn't just a ticket, it was a ticket, a messed up car, a neighbors yard to fix up, a messed up mind, and a soon to be very pissed off mother.
It was kind of weird; I just jumped right back into the car and drove right out of their yard. I felt horrible; I didn't know what to expect when I returned home. It was almost dawn so I decided to make a quick stop by the car wash, hoping that my mom wouldn't notice. Besides the damage to the car didn't look all that bad, some messed up body damage, where I had hit the mailbox, and a bunch of branches sticking out from the car.
I dropped my friend off and cruised home. I had gotten out of trouble for the night but I will hear it in the morning. The next morning I had woken up and was getting ready for school. My mother went outside to start the car to take me to school. I really didn't want to go out there. She didn't say anything the whole way to school. So I was hoping she didn't notice. I returned home from school to find the car gone and a note stuck to the refrigerator. I sat down and read it. The note said that in order to fix that neighbors’ yard the car insurance would increase three times as much as it was. Although I would have to pay it. I knew with the job I had and going to school, the only other choice I had was to surrender my license back to the state. I also had to pay for the damage to the car, which unknown to me was more than I thought. The car ended up with small body damage that equaled 250 dollars alone, a broken headlight, four new tires, and a front-end alignment needed. All of this equaled a little more than 400 dollars, which had to come out of my pocket. Everything that happens in life teaches you a lesson' is one of my philosophies. Trying to figure out what it's trying to teach you is the hard part. Except in this situation. What I learned from this life experience was that life is worth a little more than I had thought. When Elle and I were flying through the air, we remembered later, that we grabbed each other's arms and yelled 'we're gonna die' to each other. Right then death was looking us in the face and it could have been prevented. All the consequences that come with an accident aren't worth fooling around with cars. Just think about it, if I was to live and my best friend in the car with me didn't. How guilty would I feel for the rest of my life, how could I wake up everyday knowing that I had taken someone’s life away from them? So when my friends decide that they want to go play car tag, I simply let them know that cars are not toys, and if their going to do it knowing what I had to go through, then let me out. Being in an accident, being that close to death gives you a better outlook and awareness of the world. You don't take life for granted anymore and are more cautious of dangerous situations. I'm just trying to make others aware of the danger and consequences of reckless driving. Try to be careful and live life to the fullest.
Tuesday, February 25, 1997
Life (Haiku)
Life (Haiku)
Birth, life, love, sorrow,
Depression, school, work, marriage,
Kids, life, death, sorrow.
Grief, depression, birth,
Life, love, sorrow, work, marriage,
Kids, life, death, sorrow.
Birth, life, love, sorrow,
Depression, school, work, marriage,
Kids, life, death, sorrow.
Grief, depression, birth,
Life, love, sorrow, work, marriage,
Kids, life, death, sorrow.
Life is a never
Ending cycle for which we
Can never escape.
Birth, life, love, sorrow,
Depression, school, work, marriage,
Kids, life, death, sorrow.
Grief, depression, birth,
Life, love, sorrow, work, marriage,
Kids, life, death, sorrow.
Birth, life, love, sorrow,
Depression, school, work, marriage,
Kids, life, death, sorrow.
Grief, depression, birth,
Life, love, sorrow, work, marriage,
Kids, life, death, sorrow.
Life is a never
Ending cycle for which we
Can never escape.
Thursday, February 20, 1997
Dialogue: Match Made in Heaven
It is late May; everyone has 'summer fever.' "I can't wait to get out of this hell-hole," said Chad. "What are you going to do this summer?" Asked Jamie. The two of them started to daydream of all the things they could accomplish during the summer between their Junior and senior year, their minds started to drift.
There are only two more weeks of school left until the best summer of their lives approached. Exams were the furthest thing from their minds. Chad knew that he couldn't do it on his own and actually pass. Suddenly the idea popped into his head, 'ask Jamie!' 'She's smart, and good looking too, wouldn't mind using exams as an excuse to get closer to her,' he thought to himself.
The next day Chad arrived in third hour early hoping that less people would be around, so that if he gets turned down, he won't be as embarrassed. He soon made his way across the room, thinking to himself, 'she gonna turn me down, she has a boyfriend..' 'Well,' he thought, 'what's to loose? Mine as well give it a try.' He approached her desk, and squatted down in front of her. He seemed to look into her gorgeous green eyes, daydreaming, not even realizing the words that were leaving his lips. He did remember taking a hold of her warm hand and placing it between the two of his, looking into her eyes, and basically pleading that she would assist him in studying for his intense exams. His exact words were "Uh hum, *cough*, Julie, *cough*, Julie, do you think you could possibly take time from your busy schedule, to help a poor, mindless, fool, like me, study for finals?" His shy smile, the way he looked into her eyes, clenched her hand, and spoke to her, almost frightened speak, were just too irresistible to even think of saying 'no' she thought to herself. "Of course I will!" she exclaimed. With her nose in the air. "Anything to help those less fortunate than I."
The two of them proceeded to laugh together.
There are only two more weeks of school left until the best summer of their lives approached. Exams were the furthest thing from their minds. Chad knew that he couldn't do it on his own and actually pass. Suddenly the idea popped into his head, 'ask Jamie!' 'She's smart, and good looking too, wouldn't mind using exams as an excuse to get closer to her,' he thought to himself.
The next day Chad arrived in third hour early hoping that less people would be around, so that if he gets turned down, he won't be as embarrassed. He soon made his way across the room, thinking to himself, 'she gonna turn me down, she has a boyfriend..' 'Well,' he thought, 'what's to loose? Mine as well give it a try.' He approached her desk, and squatted down in front of her. He seemed to look into her gorgeous green eyes, daydreaming, not even realizing the words that were leaving his lips. He did remember taking a hold of her warm hand and placing it between the two of his, looking into her eyes, and basically pleading that she would assist him in studying for his intense exams. His exact words were "Uh hum, *cough*, Julie, *cough*, Julie, do you think you could possibly take time from your busy schedule, to help a poor, mindless, fool, like me, study for finals?" His shy smile, the way he looked into her eyes, clenched her hand, and spoke to her, almost frightened speak, were just too irresistible to even think of saying 'no' she thought to herself. "Of course I will!" she exclaimed. With her nose in the air. "Anything to help those less fortunate than I."
The two of them proceeded to laugh together.
Wednesday, February 19, 1997
Friends and Conflict
My life with my friends has been very strange to say the least. We have all been through a lot together both good and bad times. Some serious like boyfriends cheating with other friends, to petty fights; about what to do, when to do it, whom to it with, and where to do it. They all start off small and end with everybody telling everyone else what they really deep down think of them. Usually when we get into fights we try to have everyone sit down and calmly work things out. We try not to hurt one another's feelings in the process, but sometimes it's hard to get around that. My friends and I have made a lot of mistakes in the past, and probably more to come in the future, I'm sure. Most of our fights are small, nothing that should make a big deal about, but it always upsets at least someone. Our fights are caused by either we are all too much the same, or too much different, and we always seem to collide. And we're all stubborn. If we can't talk our point across, we fight it across. Then there's one who, if we don't do what he wants to do, we won't do anything. Can we say, "Spoiled?"
This all makes it very hard to communicate with these people; I can never seem to get my point across. But then again, through all the fights, we still make it out alive. We always seem to find a way around everything. Weather it be someone cracking a joke to break the tension. Or someone starting to cry, which shows everyone just how frustrated he or she really is. But I always know that I can count on my friends for at least one thing, to confide in. My friends will always be there when I need a shoulder to cry on. They have been there through boyfriends, hate, jealously, rage, sorrow, death, depression, and that little bit of love and happiness. They always have a piece of advise to throw my way, weather it be against my better judgment, or not, but it often helps.
We have been through a lot more in the last few months than I ever thought we would. I think and I am only speaking for myself, but these fights are due to everyone getting nervous because they just came to the realization. That in a few short months we will be pushed out into the real world, and have no idea how to deal with it, commonly known as frustration; along with other numerous problems in school, work, home, and personal relationships. We just want to explode and we take it out on one another, because that's whose there and somewhat understands. I feel that we have made it this far; if we stick together we can do anything.
This all makes it very hard to communicate with these people; I can never seem to get my point across. But then again, through all the fights, we still make it out alive. We always seem to find a way around everything. Weather it be someone cracking a joke to break the tension. Or someone starting to cry, which shows everyone just how frustrated he or she really is. But I always know that I can count on my friends for at least one thing, to confide in. My friends will always be there when I need a shoulder to cry on. They have been there through boyfriends, hate, jealously, rage, sorrow, death, depression, and that little bit of love and happiness. They always have a piece of advise to throw my way, weather it be against my better judgment, or not, but it often helps.
We have been through a lot more in the last few months than I ever thought we would. I think and I am only speaking for myself, but these fights are due to everyone getting nervous because they just came to the realization. That in a few short months we will be pushed out into the real world, and have no idea how to deal with it, commonly known as frustration; along with other numerous problems in school, work, home, and personal relationships. We just want to explode and we take it out on one another, because that's whose there and somewhat understands. I feel that we have made it this far; if we stick together we can do anything.
Tuesday, February 18, 1997
Character Sketch
Description: Woman, who dearly wants to fall in love with someone, have a meaningful relationship, start a family and live a long cherished life. The man she falls for isn't all he's cracked up to be. When they first met it was love at first sight for the both of them. He treated her like a goddess. Bought her flowers, candy, took her out to dinners, movies, shopping, they basically spent a lot of quality time together, got to know each other well. Although it was love at first sight, the two of them had the same idea. Not to start out too seriously, but a little unexpected the two of them shared one thing with each other, something that she had waited all her life to do, now it is with the man.
That she had always dreamed about. The physical aspect that ignited the true feelings that they both had bottled up inside their hearts. Now they were expressing them with one another, through making love. Their emotions ran wild; it was the best evening of her life. He started off with a candle light dinner followed, with a few soft, romantic, love song dances. She started to feel like she could trust him with all her heart. Although she'd had only been used to hatred of all her past relationships, being blown off, used, and even sometimes abused.
All she ever wanted was a decent man who would know how to treat a lady. This man fits all the identities of who and what she wants from a significant other. I'm not sure how their relationship will turn out, nor their names or what they look like.
That she had always dreamed about. The physical aspect that ignited the true feelings that they both had bottled up inside their hearts. Now they were expressing them with one another, through making love. Their emotions ran wild; it was the best evening of her life. He started off with a candle light dinner followed, with a few soft, romantic, love song dances. She started to feel like she could trust him with all her heart. Although she'd had only been used to hatred of all her past relationships, being blown off, used, and even sometimes abused.
All she ever wanted was a decent man who would know how to treat a lady. This man fits all the identities of who and what she wants from a significant other. I'm not sure how their relationship will turn out, nor their names or what they look like.
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